30 Oct 2026
There’s something remarkably inspirational about taking a devastating and life-changing diagnosis and turning your adversity and trauma into something both positive and supportive.
Cancer survivor Melanie North is one of those people you cannot help but admire. After undergoing gruelling rounds of treatment for rectal cancer, she was then faced with a vital operation which left her permanently with a stoma.
This is a surgically created opening on the abdomen which collects bodily waste in a waterproof medical pouch. Mel has a colostomy (large bowel) but there is also an ileostomy (small bowel).
An estimated 205,000 people in the UK have a stoma – that’s one in 335 – and around 13,500 to 21,000 new stoma operations are performed in the UK each year.
After trying and failing to find any face-to-face support groups for people with bowel cancer or a stoma in the St Albans area, Melanie decided to set up one herself in 2025.
Her Instagram group @friendswithstomas now has more than 6,000 followers and she hosts regular monthly social and support meetings for those with a stoma, or might need one, had one or care for someone with one.
She told her story: “I was diagnosed with rectal cancer in 2022. It took me about six months to get the doctors to listen to me because I was only 43 and had no history in my family, but I pushed for a colonoscopy because my symptoms were getting worse.
“I was told I needed radiotherapy and chemotherapy, and if that worked a big operation which would leave me with a stoma that couldn’t be reversed. I was like, ‘OK cool, let’s get on with this’, and fortunately it was successful and they got everything, so there was no cancer left, but I had my rectum removed and sewn up.
“Because my surgery was planned I saw a stoma nurse before my operation, to work out where would be the best place for the surgeon to place the stoma.
“She then helped me adjust at first and learn how to change my colostomy bag. I can still do most things – and have to be mindful of lifting and where there is a toilet nearby – but for me it saved my life.
“While I was recovering off work at home, I started looking online for support groups. I’ve got a good family but I didn’t know anyone else who had a similar journey. All I found in St Albans was a breast cancer group, which is amazing to have, but not what I needed.”
Initially working with a friend who had a temporary stoma following an operation for endometriosis, they decided to create an Instagram page to share tips on living with a stoma. It was such a huge success, that it became apparent that a face-to-face group was also very much needed.
In September 2025 Mel held her first stoma support group.
A resident of Marshalswick, she initially put up posters in the Jersey Farm Tesco and Quadrant bistro Fade to Black, and also advertised on social media to try and spread the interest.
The first meeting took place at The Rose and Crown in Sandridge in September 2025, and 25 people turned up. Some had taken a day off work to attend.
“I didn’t know how many people were going to come along, especially as it’s such a taboo and personal subject. Some people came on their own, people came as a couple, there was a man from up my road who I didn’t know had a stoma, two ladies from Hemel who discovered they lived in the same street…
“We’ve now got a core group of all ages which meets at The Ancient Briton since The Rose and Crown closed down. It’s a mix of a social thing and the understanding that the other people there are in a similar situation so if you need to ask for advice then you know where to turn.
“It’s also about raising awareness that we are there. I had an email a couple of days ago from a woman in Tyttenhanger whose doctor had passed on my details and wanted to come to the group.”
Many celebrities with stomas are now revealing their own experiences of the condition in a bid to break down some of the taboos.
In April 2024 former Made in Chelsea star Louise Thompson revealed how she was fitted with a stoma bag after a severe flare-up of ulcerative colitis. The bartender from Channel 4’s First Dates, Merlin Griffiths, underwent bowel cancer surgery in 2022 and lived with a stoma bag for nine months before having it reversed in early 2023, and the model and reality TV star Mollie Pearce – famous for appearing on The Traitors and Dancing On Ice – has lived with a colostomy bag since she was 18 years old after being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at 11.
Unfortunately Melanie says there is still some way to go: “There are some people I speak to on Instagram who haven’t told their work or their family, and I think it’s quite sad because you’re keeping something to yourself which is so big, but doesn’t need to be.”
Melanie is a now an ambassdor for Convatec – a global medical products and technologies company which makes colostomy bags – and recently was a guest at their live online Town Hall meeting to 10,000 staff worldwide.
“Before my diagnosis there’s no way I would have talked about something because I didn’t have the confidence, and I don’t know where it’s come from, but now I’ve gone global!
“I love being able to get people connected and feel comfortable talking to others.
“Having a stoma can be very lonely and isolating, so I would encourage anyone who wants to talk or just browse, to get in touch through my Instagram at @friendswithstomas or the website www.friendswithstomas.co.uk.”
