21 Jun 2025
When District Judge Mayo Walters became unwell with pulmonary fibrosis she resolved to plan her end of life – which meant paying to go on a private plane to Dignitas, something her husband, though fully supportive, feels people should not have to go through.
On Friday a crucial vote on the Terminally Ill Adults (End of Life) Bill took place at the House of Commons, when MPs voted to introduce new safeguards to prevent health professionals raising the subject of assisted dying with children.
The bill was backed by 314 votes to 291 following an emotional debate which saw MPs recount their own experiences of seeing their friends and relatives die. It will now go to the House of Lords for further scrutiny.
Under the proposed legislation, anyone over 18 (in England or Wales) registered with a GP for a year minimum and expected to die within six months would be able to bring their life to an end using fatal drugs.
The patient would have to be deemed to have mental capacity and express a clear, settled and informed wish free from coercion or pressure.
Retired Redbourn resident David Walters believes it is a positive step for this country. His late wife, Mayo, had seen her father wanting to die in his later life, but with no control over his final days and she didn’t want to find herself in the same position.
As it became clear that the treatments were no longer working and her condition was progressing to the terminal phase, Mayo shared her plans to apply to Dignitas with the family, who were fully aware of her long-term support of assisted dying.
The process was robust with many checks on both the severity of Mayo’s illness as well as her mental capacity to make the decision, David said.
By the end of 2023, she was very unwell and her children went one at a time to visit her to say goodbye, although she did not pass away then.
In February 2024 the process for her planned passing at Dignitas had been agreed by them but because her doctor there was on holiday, Mayo could not actually end her life peacefully until April. She passed on April 18 with her daughter and husband holding her hand as she drifted away.
By that time, Mayo was too unwell to be allowed to fly as a regular commercial airline passenger and so had to pay for a private jet. The total cost of the process was around £30,000 which Mayo funded herself.
Once a doctor had agreed all was in hand to go ahead with Mayo’s wish, she had a very calm passing under her terms which went as well as could be expected.
David and Mayo’s daughter both believe a peaceful, controlled death free from pain should not only be available to those who can afford it and are in favour of the proposed legislation.
David said: “The deeper issue isn’t the money—it’s the inequality embedded in access to dignity at the end of life.
“It should be a choice available to those who wish to avail of assisted dying as their route, and shouldn’t be constrained by financial means.”
Is David happy with the way the Government is considering the bill? The 73 year-old, who lives in North Common, said: “I totally agree that this should be a free vote, and MPs should examine the pros and cons without worrying about the effect on their careers.
“I am glad that the need for a judge/legal review has been reviewed and moved to a three-person panel comprising of a senior legal figure, a psychiatrist and a social worker.
“This panel may have a wider breadth of experience and knowledge to review the request in addition to not adding additional burden on to the court system.
“My concern, having lived through the final months with someone in this position, is that it must not be a great bureaucratic burden. There isn’t time.”
He explained that he believes there is a balance to be struck between ensuring the necessary safeguards are in place to protect vulnerable people and also making sure the process does not become so complex that it is not accessible to those who fulfil the criteria outlined in the bill.
He added: “In its current form, the Assisted Dying Bill will give options to people, like Mayo, who are clear in their wishes and despite receiving excellent care and palliative care services want to access assisted dying services as they approach the end of their illness.
“Deciding to not pass this law will not remove the need for assisted dying.
“It will just restrict it to the few who have the funds, and the organisational ability, to accomplish it abroad. Hardly a sign of a progressive society.”
David said he recognises that some people have very strongly held views on the proposed law, and that they should be able to live by their beliefs: “But should they be able to dictate to others that they must be deprived of this choice?
“This is a very personal decision and not for everyone, but the current situation is that those who do want to take this option are either left doing it in a medically uncontrolled situation within the UK putting themselves and sometimes their family at risk, or having to spend a lot of money going to Switzerland or other countries which offer medically assisted dying.
“Just because there is a legal option to allow this medical procedure does not mean that you have to use it. Legalising this is not enforcing it on everyone.”
How would it have improved circumstances for the Walters, had this been legal in this country last year?
“Knowing that we were imminently going to lose someone very close to us, to a pernicious, relentless disease, and we were legally prevented from helping, or sharing with friends who could also have lent support, was particularly hard. This caused her great sadness.
“If assisted dying had been available in the UK when Mayo was ill, then Mayo would not have had to undertake the expensive and stressful journey to Switzerland when she was very unwell, and she would have been able to have more of her immediate family with her at the end.”
Mayo’s daughter, Grania is a medical professional in a closely related field and was a great source of both support and second opinions, David said.
He added: “At each stage, she was able to confirm that the actions being proposed, and the consultants and hospitals were those best suited to our needs. Without this, I don’t know how one would navigate the system.”
In the weeks before she passed away, Mayo Walters wrote a personal blog explaining her reasons for wanting an assisted death. We are sharing this very moving account beyond her family and close friends for the first time. please be aware that some sections may prove upsetting.
13th March, 2024
When I watched my beloved father die an undignified death in 2000, I swore that if I had a choice I would never let it happen to me.
This view was reinforced when I took Bos, my dear dog, to the vet in Redbourn and sat with him while he had an injection which allowed him to pass away peacefully with me beside him.
Yes, there were tears, but I had not let him down or let him die in pain, whereas I could not help my dearest father in his hour of need.
So, from then on, I resolved to follow Dignitas and also Dignity in Dying and hoped that as a nation we would pass legislation to help people of a sound mind with a terminal illness to end their life.
Alas, it is now 2024 and we are still no further down the line to legalising assisted dying, although other civilised countries are leaving us behind.
I am aged 76 and, until three years ago, led a full and active life, in the best of health. I played golf three times a week, went on walking holidays, travelled all over the world and worked full- and part-time until I was 70.
I volunteered for various roles in the community, and my best retirement occupation was training to be a guide in St Albans Cathedral. I loved meeting visitors from all over the world and sharing with them my knowledge of a cathedral and abbey church from the 11th century. A truly wonderful church with so many great volunteers.
I have been diagnosed with interstitial lung disease with no known cause.
Three years ago, I started getting breathless walking uphill. I did manage five days walking the Northumberland Coast with a friend, although it was a real struggle at the end of each day. A series of tests, a bronchoscopy and lung functions etc., confirmed the diagnosis. To be told you have an incurable disease is a body-blow, as was the dreaded internet research, which talked about a three year prognosis.
So I moved up a gear, and decided I was not going to die some horrible death, choking, gasping for air, incontinent, and worse. Fortunately, I have a loving and supportive husband and family, as well as money that I have saved over the years, so I can afford to go this way if I am still well enough to
fly to Zurich.
There are a number of people interviewed in the media who blithely say that they are going to Switzerland to die as they have a terminal disease. Well, for those people I just hope they realise the hoops that have to be gone through, firstly to get “the green light” to even be considered, and then to complete all the paperwork and documents the Swiss authorities require.
Firstly, you have to become a member of Dignitas (100 CHF) and then you have to supply lots of recent medical records and a personal statement outlining your life and reasons for wanting to end it all. If that is successful, then there is another fee (3,000 CHF). The next stage is the admin for Switzerland: an original birth certificate, marriage certificate, recent doctor’s report, and an affidavit of domicile (witnessed by a public notary, £120) are all required.
Now I am waiting for a reissued birth certificate, and when that arrives I will try to arrange a date.
We will have to fly—probably by private plane at £20,000—and then arrange two or three nights in Zürich so that the doctors can meet me and arrange the final prescription. No mention yet of the final fees for this, and then the cremation.
Sitting here on 13th March, it’s in some ways weird to think I will see no more birthdays, Christmases or happy events like graduations and weddings, nor the achievements of my four wonderful grandchildren that will give such joy to their parents.
I never praised my three children enough. Tiger mother, perhaps, but it was always that I wanted you to reach your potential. And you have.
What fun we’ve had as a family! Not to mention the amazing weddings. You know Granny used to say that I wasted money. But always for great reasons!
My choice to end it all has been hard for me but I’m sure worse for you and David, and I bless you and thank you for accepting it. I can’t begin to tell you how frightening it is to find your body is failing and the lungs are declining so fast. I don’t want you all to see me in distress, drugged to the eyes and incontinent. It may appear selfish, but, honestly, I have been trying to make it as easy as possible for you after I’ve gone.
David would like my ashes to be placed in the grounds of St Mary’s Church in Redbourn, so forget about scattering my ashes on the 10th tee at Royal County Down!
I will add to this later when hopefully we get a date for Zürich.
1st April, 2024
This is no longer a joke! I have been given the date of 18th April. This is the first date available for the doctor to meet me on the 16th , then again on the 17th to obtain the prescription for the death on the 18th.
It all seems a bit unreal, and my biggest concern is whether I will get there in time, as this disease is progressing and I need more oxygen every day and also at night.
I look out at our lovely garden bursting forth in spring and realise I will not see it in May or ever again. However, using my positive mind to its utmost, I keep thinking that there is no way out of this, and need to go while the going is fairly good.
Grania is organising the hotel, oxygen, and aircraft from this end, and she and David will accompany me in the private jet. Everyone I have corresponded with in Dignitas seems very pleasant and are making things as easy as possible. From now on I just want to keep well(ish) and be able to make the
journey.
7th April, 2024
Last weekend in Redbourn and it is beautiful sunny weather – just as I want to remember it. I have had the most wonderful, interesting life and seen and done so much. My career was great, and I loved the work, which also provided me with a good pension and enough money to have never had to worry about choices in life. I have left enough capital in the house for the three families to get a nice benefit, and hopefully David will be able to relocate to something more manageable when he feels like it.
I have seen all three children and grandchildren in the last few weeks and, while it has been heartbreaking for me, I hope they will have happy memories of a Granny who loved them so much.
Now I must concentrate on the last ten days—trying to see as many friends as possible and keeping the plans secret, apart from a few. The jet is booked, as is the hotel in Zurich, oxygen, etc., and Grania and David are coming with me, which is wonderful.
I was always fairly brave but this is the biggest test of my life so far, and I do not want to fail. A dignified death is a good option.
It is very frightening, but the alternative is much more frightening to me. As Grania put it so succinctly, I have always been in control of life events – including having all three children induced to suit my requirements! If I had thought this illness was going to be quick, I probably would not have
taken this option, but I have experienced a horrible decline in energy and body in the last two years.
I am thankful that my loving family and husband have agreed, and that I have the money to pay all the fees for this.
So it’s just a matter of keeping going as normal for the next few days and trying to talk and see lots of friends, although I think a few of them have some suspicions. It certainly will be a good talking point at the golf club later!
I may or may not add to this before next week, but at least we will go for our last journey on a private jet with no queuing at Luton Airport, and with a Limo to get us there as well.
I say a big thanks to all my amazing friends and hope they will understand and forgive if required. They have seen me wired up with oxygen but luckily not much worse, and my marbles seem to have stayed pretty much intact!
Just enjoy every minute of life and let’s remember the happy and funny times!
Addendum by David, 19th April, 2024
Yesterday was a difficult day. It started with a video-call from the doctor to check that Mayo was still determined to continue. Never in doubt.
Then a short car ride to the assigned clinic – in the snow! An admittance to a very calming room to carry out the millionth checks – identity, soundness of mind, determination, and other paperwork (only original and certified documents would do).
Mayo was shown to a comfortable bed and we chatted about life memories. Then, having taken the medicine, Mayo drifted off to sleep, her hands being held by me and Grania. So peaceful. As Mayo would have said, it was so much more preferable than months of pain and suffering. She will be missed.
Addendum by Grania, 19th April, 2024
All Mum’s planning paid off and we made it to Zurich. Unfortunately, the mini-heatwave broke just as we arrived, and so our plans for wheelchair-friendly walks were replaced by drives around Lake Zürich, reliving memories of Irish holidays: “On a good day the views are amazing but unfortunately all you can see today is cloud and rain!”
A lovely final dinner with laughs and memories, finished off with a glass of Black Bush whiskey set us up for the next day. Thursday the rain had turned to snow as we made our way to the house.
The room was full of light and the bed looked out onto a lovely garden, which was turning white as we settled in.
The process was professional and respectful of the enormity of the decision and the emotions it caused.
It is a two-step process, so as the first anti-sickness medication took its time to work we chatted about Mum’s memories of holidays, how much she loves her children and grandchildren and feels loved by us, and the amazing people she has met in her life and the friendships that bring her such joy and have in all their various ways given her the strength to do this.
And then the time came for the second step and Mum felt the time was right, she was at peace with her decision and knew she was supported and loved by her family.
She passed peacefully with David and I holding her hands. Mum got her wish: a peaceful and dignified death, as the world around had that unique silence that comes with a heavy snowfall.
Mayo Elizabeth Walters – May 8 1947- April 18 2024
